Tuesday, January 04, 2005

fat

Walking into the hospital this morning, a bit late, I walked and nearly overtook two fat people in the halls. But I couldn't get past, because they were too fat. I wish I were a nice person, but I'm not. And if you want proof, listen to my thoughts as I struggled to get around them, "fuck, I'm late." As I moved to the left. I found myself suddenly unable to pass as the slightly larger one wobbled left as well, "holy shit, these people are fat. She's probably at least 300, probably more. And she's about 5 feet tall. They can't move fast, because they can't move all that weight around, but move! (I thought this in a series of mass/velocity/momentum/inertia terms and experiments that for some reason remain a vestigial portion of my brain, unused and useless) MOVE!" I then tried to dodge right because there was a small opening to the right of the thinner of the two, but just then someone came from the other way and they had to make room. At that point I closed my eyes, wished for death, and the person behind me, who was also stuck behind the wall of flesh, bumped into me, spilling a binder of papers to the floor. I picked up two.

The wall of flesh kept on moving. Since I couldn't see in front of them I assumed they were devouring everything in their path. My new friend and I stuck close and the hallway opened up slightly, allowing us to pass.

I'm a jerk. It wasn't their fault that I was late. Can fat people prevent being fat? Yes they can. Can I prevent myself from thinking evil thoughts? Not really. They just seem to come to me. When it comes to really, deep down, being a dick, it's just part of me, and it seems beyond my control.

But you know what; I caught that other person's eyes as he bumped into me. I know I'm not the only evil person out there.

Also, I'd rather be evil than fat.

7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Doc,

Forgive the anonymous post. I don't have an account. My name is Stephen Baker (jstephenbaker@juno.com). I found your blog through a comment that you made on another blog. Brandon Pickett was writing about the real presence of Christ in the Lord's Supper. Your comment was, "Why bother positing all this nonsense about inner sin that Jesus washes away? Why would God want people to have sin, then take it away? I don't get it. Already seems too complex and made up. Anyway, some sin is good. I love good sin."

Then I read this blog of yours about fat people in the hospital hallway. At the end you say, "I'm a jerk. It wasn't their fault that I was late. Can fat people prevent being fat? Yes they can. Can I prevent myself from thinking evil thoughts? Not really. They just seem to come to me. When it comes to really, deep down, being a dick, it's just part of me, and it seems beyond my control."

You are exactly right. And I am the same way. We have evil thoughts. They do seem to just come to us, don't they? And yes, they are beyond our control.

So here is my point: How can you say, "Why bother positing all this nonsense about inner sin that Jesus washes away?" Why do you call something "nonsense" that you very well know exists in your own heart? You know that your thoughts towards the fat people were "evil." You know that the evil is inside you, not the result of some outside force. You know that you are guilty for it. And you know that you are helpless against it. The reality of "inner sin" is very real to you, isn't it?

There is a message that deals with all of those realities. It explains them. It explains their source and why they are evil. And it provides a deep, radical, outside-of-myself hope for transformation. How, then, can you call that "nonsense"? You know you are powerless against your sin--and yes, you know it is sin. But you turn your back on the only source of help and hope: Jesus Christ, who lived a sinless life in the place of sinners like us, stood in our place by being executed for our crimes, rose from the dead and conquered death, and promises forgiveness and a new heart for all who turn away from their self-righteousness and pride and self-sufficiency and self-satisfaction and put all of their hopes in him alone. This is the "good news." Jesus has come to transform us into people who want to love our neighbor as ourselves, who can take pity on those who are unable to control their diet, for example, because we know what it is to be unable to control ourselves.

I encourage you not to avoid these realities. Deep down, you know they are true. Otherwise, why bother fighting against them? Please email me personally if you want to talk about this.

Warmly,
Stephen Baker

8:38 AM  
Blogger Doc NOS said...

Mr. Baker,

"There is a message that deals with all of those realities. It explains them."

Beware of explanations that explain everything. If they are too easy, then they always ring false.

Anyway, what I'm calling nonsense is the idea that God gave us sin. There is no God. We are the way we are, some of which I call evil, but I'm not using that word in the same way you are. I'm using it as a man made invention, designed by us, for us, with no otherworldly creature (or creatures) involved.

2:47 PM  
Blogger Sally said...

It's not true to say that God gave us sin. Rather, what God gave us was free will - and it is this free will which human beings used and use even now to sin, to commit wrongs against God.

God is inherently good and perfect. Mankind is inherently sinful, though we all try to hide our evil by outwardly doing 'good things' - but our evil nature is something of which all of us are all too aware.

God teaches that such deeds deserve death. Hebrews 9:27 says that 'man is destined to die once, and after that to face judgment'. Romans 6:23 says 'the wages of sin is death'. But it continues to say 'the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.' This is because God loves us, as his children and creation, so much that he does not want us to be held in bondage to sin - he gives us a way out by no longer putting our faith in our sinful selves but in Christ.

Every human being is faced with a choice: to accept Jesus Christ as their saviour and Lord and live in obedience to him, or to reject him and live in allegiance to our own sinful selves.

Which will you choose?

4:12 PM  
Blogger 柯云 said...

2015-12-18keyun
uggs on sale
michael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet online
the north face jackets
michael kors
the north face jackets
ugg outlet
pandora charms
fit flops
timberlands
louis vuitton purses
kids lebron shoes
michaek kors
louis vuitton handbags
ray ban sunglasses
coach outlet online
replica rolex watches
coach factory outlet online
michael kors outlet
prada
louis vuitton outlet stores
cheap ugg boots
ugg boots
coach outlet
nike roshe run mens
louis vuitton handbags
canada goose
michael kors outlet clearance
ralph lauren
coach factory outlet
supra shoes
vans sneakers
coach outlet store
louis vuitton outlet
true religion
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton outlet online
gucci handbags
discount ugg boots
the north face jackets

4:47 PM  
Blogger 风骚污男 said...

20170223 junda
tiffany jewelry
polo outlet
michael kors handbags
pandora charms sale clearance
coach outlet
swarovski crystal
louis vuitton outlet
ralph lauren
michael kors outlet
cheap jordans for sale

1:40 AM  
Blogger LCc 03 said...

michael kors outlet
true religion jeans
Kanye West shoes
jordan shoes
nike huarache
cheap jordans
adidas superstar shoes
longchamp handbags
links of london
yeezy boost 350

11:49 PM  
Blogger raybanoutlet001 said...

michael kors handbags sale
michael kors handbags
boston celtics jersey
nike trainers
golden state warriors
new york giants jerseys
nike free
nike trainers
ralph lauren
pittsburgh steelers jersey

2:48 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home